Today’s Highlight

Caste Names

Caste has again taken centre-stage in the context of the ensuing census. But, there is another aspect of caste – names –  which is discussed in “Can neutral names erase caste?”

Bob’s Banter

Drunken Driving

Bob writes “Drunken Driving and Other Stories..!”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

Can Neutral Names Erase Caste?

By John B. Monteiro

 What’s in a name? that which we call rose

By any other name would smell as sweet.

 -William Shakespeare, English dramatic poet (1564-1616).

 The comments on names go back to the Bible: “A good name rather to be chosen then great riches.” Proverbs XXII-1. Then again in Ecclesiastes VII-1: “A good name is better than precious ointment.” William Cowper, English poet (1731-1800):

Some to the fascination of a name,

Surrender judgment hoodwinked.

 Names are evocative. Dawood Ibrahim evokes different image than Nehru or Gandhi. One of the things that Indian names, specially surnames, evoke is the caste of the person bearing the name. Such names evoke an image of respect or contempt. In this context, Dr. Anbumani Ramadoss, former Union Minister of Health and Family Welfare, argues, in an article in The Hindu (27-8-10) that caste names are an impediment to social justice and holistic development. Here are some excerpts from the article:

 Social division and discrimination are not unique to India, nor is the practice restricted to any part of the globe. The slave system, the clan system, the class system are no different or less venomous than our own caste prejudices. But caste is the longest and most formidable of all forms of oppression still prevalent in the history of mankind. The word caste derives from the Portuguese ‘casta’ meaning race, breed or kind. In India is popularly referred to as ‘jati’ or ‘jaadi’. The original purpose of the caste system was social stratification according to occupation so that society could function in harmony. But, gradually it became exploitive, giving rise to social injustices and inequality among people.

 Caste is a mantle or membership we acquire at birth. As we know, we not only inherit our genes from our parents but also our caste from our forefathers. How then we eliminate caste from this mainstream of our society? It would be naïve to think we can just wash it away. A lot has been said and written about the vagaries of the caste system. I am particularly perturbed by one of the commonest forms of discrimination that has been largely ignored at the least and denied at the worst – that is the practice of tagging caste of clan suffixes to given names like Sharma, Verma, Nair, Iyer, etc.

 The effect of name should never be underestimated. What is in a name, one may wonder? Well what isn’t? The first thing we learn from a person after greeting him or her is his or her name. Names not only reflect or personality but also gives us the first inkling of the religion, race or community we belong to. We are named after our ancestors, family members, after popular icons, clan, occupation, religion or even the locality we are from. There is a confusing array of names, middle names, nick names, given names. You name it, it is there. But what concerns me most are the adhesive caste names the so-called intellectuals go by while vociferously demanding that casteism be abolished.

 I am deeply intrigued when Mani Iyer or Ravi Verma or Rahul Shashtri talks or writes about a casteless society, or labels others as caste fanatics. Their intellectual posturing is exposed when they stubbornly refuse to let go of these commonly used suffixes which are purely caste or sect names. Their blatant flaunting of their caste is indeed ironic in itself and most devious simply because it is so subtle, and on the surface unapparent.

 There have been numerous instances in the education and job sectors where examiners and interviewers have been fovourable to candidate of their own community by just glancing at the caste suffix names or vindictive to candidates whose community they loathe. This name-dropping has the tacit connivance of the teaching faculty which poses a challenge to the concept of equal opportunity. It is, however, not my contention that for a casteless society, we need a nameless one.

 My great-grandfather’s name is Aanai Gounder, my grandfather’s name is Sanjeevaraya Gounder, where ‘Gounder’ denotes a caste name. My father’s name is S Ramadoss, while mine is Anbumani Ramadoss, which is just a patronymic, generic name.

 Caste names are an impediment to social justice and to the holistic development of India. A welcome trend in recent times is the increasing adoption of neutral generic names that do not pertain to any religion or caste.

 It would be naïve to assume that dispensing with caste names will lead to a casteless society.  Caste names are only part of the problem rather than the solution. There is no pat solution to this dilemma. The adoption of generic names would be a small but definite step towards eradicating caste from this society.

 The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.

This morning’s paper had a picture of a Bollywood actor caught for drunken driving and as I looked at his red, flushed, surprised and angry face I thought I’d cheer him up by relating other incidents of drunken driving and drunks:

A policeman was waiting outside a bar looking fro drunk drivers. At closing time he sees a bunch of guys coming out, each going towards his car, but there’s one fellow who he can make out is absolutely drunk; he stumbles to his car, trips on the pavement, and fumbles with his keys for five minutes.

When he finally gets into the car it takes the man another five minutes to get the key into the ignition, meanwhile all the others have got into their cars and driven away, but the policeman can’t be bothered as he realizes he’s got a big fish!

The man finally starts the car, and the policeman stops him, he pulls him over and gives him a breathalyzer test. The test shows he has a blood alcohol content of zero. “This can’t be right!” says the angry policeman. “Yes it is!” says the suddenly sober looking man, “Today I was the designated decoy, I had to do the drunk driver act, while the others got away!”

Maybe the Bollywood actor should read this story, but knowing the fellow I doubt he’s got any friends who would help him by being a designated decoy.

And here’s another about a policeman and a drunk: A man is driving home dead drunk, late at night when a policeman stops him, “I’ll let you off,” says the policeman, “If you give me an excuse I’ve never heard before, so tell me where are you going at this time of the night?”

“I’m going for a lecture!”

“And who’s going to give a lecture at this time of the hour?” asks the policeman.

“My wife!” says the drunk, as the policeman guffaws and lets him off.

Not all wives give lectures, some give even more, as this little tale shows: A man is in a bar talking to his friend, Last night while I was out drinking a burglar broke into my house!”

“Did he get anything?” asks his friend.

“Yes,” says the man, “He got a broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken ribs. My wife thought it was me coming home drunk!”

But sadly we in our country are the biggest hypocrites when it comes to drinking, many people I know have a drink quite often yet pretend that it is the biggest sin in the world, as you will see in this last joke of mine:

A woman is chatting with her friends when she points to a man in the street, “That’s my next door neighbour, he’s always drinking!”

One of her friends asks, “How do you know?”

The woman replies, “Yesterday he was at the bar drinking next to me all night..!”

 Today’s Highlight

Bungling Babus

Many babus are full of themselves and act insensitively as reflected in the latest Viswanath Anand episode, fully explained in “Should We Have Bungling Babus?”

Bob’s Banter

Damage of Hurts

Bob delivers his homily on the permanent damage done by hurts through uncontrolled anger in “Temper Scars..!”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

Should We Have Bungling Babus?

By John B. Monteiro

 As quick as lightning, in the breach

Just in the place where honour’s lodged,

As wise philosophers have judged,

Because a kick in that place more

Hurts honour than deep wounds before.

 - Samuel Butler, English writer and humorist (1612-1680).

 When Indian-origin persons settled abroad win Nobel prizes or any awards, like for books, Indians are quick to bask in reflected glory by focusing on their Indian roots. But bureaucrats are made of different stuff – rule-bound, insensitive and self-rightious. This surfaced again when babus questioned the Indian nationality of World Chess Champion (many times over) when it came to processing a proposal to confer an honorary doctorate on him. The sordid background to this sorry episode, for which HRD Minister Kapil Sibal apologized for the insensitive action of his ministry’ babus, is highlighted in an exclusive report by R Ramachandran in The Hindu (24-8-10):

 The inexplicable bureaucratic stalling by the Ministry of Human Resource Development (MHRD) and the consequent falling through, of the proposal to award an honorary doctorate to world class champion Vishwanathan Anand and Prof. David Mumford of Harvard University has caused a major embarrassment to the Executive Organizing Committee (EOC) of the ongoing International Congress of Mathematicians (ICM) 2010 in Hyderabad.

 The proposal to honour Anand had been mooted by the EOC about a year ago. This was enthusiastically supported by the Central University of Hyderabad (UoH), which was to confer the doctorate on Monday (August 23) at a special convocation.

 Indeed, Anand, who is scheduled to play simultaneous chess with 40 mathematicians on Tuesday, arrived in the city on Sunday itself in the belief that the function to honour him was going to take place as scheduled. Though Anand is supposed to have taken the incident quite sportingly, he is apparently a little upset at the Delhi babudom raising issues about his nationality. “I want my country back,” a somewhat annoyed Anand is supposed to have remarked.

 From the sequence of events it would seem that there was deliberate effort by the MHRD to kill the idea. The germ of the idea, which included asking Anand to play with mathematicians, was sown as far back as four years ago after the previous ICM in Madrid at a dinner gathering, organized by the Indian Embassy, to which Anand was also invited. Following this, the initiative was taken by Raghunathan, Chairman of the EOC, to write to. Anand seeking his approval and then having the proposal cleared by the EOC as well as the organizing committee of the ICM 2010.

 After this, the EOC forwarded its proposal to the UoH and the proposal was fully backed by the Vice-Chancellor who, in turn, put up the proposal before the executive bodies of the university. The university Executive Committee (EC) cleared the proposal about six months ago. Meanwhile, the EOC had also conceived of the idea of similarly honouring Prof. Mumford, a world renowned algebraic geometrician from Harvard University and long-term friend and associate of Indian mathematicians.

 This was followed by the approvals being cleared by the Chancellor R. Chidambaram, which took about three months. The proposals were then forwarded to the MHRD by June 2010, according to Prof. Rajat Tandon of the Department of Mathematics of the UoH, who is also the secretary of the EOC. This set in motion a continuous battle of wits between the Ministry bureaucracy and the university. MHRD director R D Sahay apparently first questioned Anand’s nationality and said the process required clearance by the Home Ministry as well as the Ministry of External Affairs. He apparently also questioned the university on holding a special convocation ceremony just to accommodate the convenience of foreigners!

 The EOC rebutted the Ministry’s contention on Anand’s nationality and alongside sent all the details of Prof. Mumford. The Ministry questioning Anand’s nationality apparently annoyed his wife so much that she immediately faxed Anand’s passport on July 30. This too was immediately forwarded to the Ministry.

 Then began a series of exchanges between the university Registrar and the Ministry that the papers sent by the university were incomplete, with a claims of a different document ostensibly missing every time. But after repeated faxing of all  the document, about over two weeks ago,  Sahay apparently finally agreed that the set of documents for the two proposals was complete, Prof. Tandon said.

 However, nothing seems to be happening beyond that. This forced the EOC to impress upon the office of President, who is the Visitor to the university, to call for the documents from the Ministry to give the final mandatory signature. But even this did not seem to have made any effect on the Ministry. As a result, the entire proposal had to be shelved late on Sunday night after the EOC gave up all hopes of any chance of a positive result. While Anand was forced to spend an entire day in his hotel room, Prof. Mumford decided to leave on Sunday night itself for a travel around the country.   

The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.

Yesterday the wife and I were talking and she asked me about somebody who, however much I tried to, never wanted to take my hand in friendship.

“Why is he like that?” she asked, “Normally you do manage to make friends easily!”

“I guess he’s never really forgiven me,” I said.

“For what?” she asked.

“For something I wrote about him twenty-one years ago!”

Yes, it was twenty one years ago, when I was much younger and knew that I could use the power of the pen that I’d written about this man who I’d considered a bit of a bully; I’d been harsh and could have been gentler, but had lashed out in anger, and now so many years later, the scar hadn’t healed.

Which reminds me of a story:

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper.  His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence.  

Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down.  He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.  Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. 

He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence and told him, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence.  The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.

You can put a knife in a man and draw it out.  But it won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound will still be there!” 

A verbal wound is as bad as a physical one.

So true isn’t it?

We think that by going across and saying sorry, the next day, all is forgotten and forgiven, but it hardly works that way, does it?

Wounds heal, but the scars are there everyday for you to look at and be reminded about some incident or somebody.

I guess it’s better not to leave scars, which means that even when you want to say something nasty or do something in anger, try to hold back; those scars are not worth fighting against the rest of your life..!

Today’s Highlight

Valuing Land

There are disputes galore about the method and quantum of compensation for the land acquired for public purposes and now the Supreme Court has set a new benchmark as noted in “How To Value Land’s Potential?”

Bob’s Banter

Commonwealth Games

Bob has a satirical piece against the backdrop of the impending Commonwealth Games in “Mysterious India..!”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

How To Value Land’s Potential?

By John B. Monteiro

 “The first farmer was the first man, and all his historic nobility rests on the possession and use of land.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson, US essayist and poet (1803-1882).

 “And he gave it for his opinion, ‘that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind and do more essential service than the whole race of politicians put together’” – Jonathan Swift, Irish satirist (1667-1745).

 With the advancement of industrialization over the last two century, the agrarian and pastoral economy has taken a back seat. In the bargain, the land of the farmers has often been snatched away from them to put it to industrial use. This has happened, and is happening, in India in the context of setting up mega projects in the steel, cement, power, mining, oil extraction and refining as also chemicals, petrochemicals and fertilizers. The latest to grab lands of the farmers are scores of special economic zones. In earlier times, lands were taken away from farmers against no or a pittance of compensation. Generally farmers were illiterate and docile and could not think of challenging the government – which was considered as pissing in the sand, with nothing to show for result.

 In recent years, farmers have become aware of their rights and also learnt to fight in concert. This has resulted in progressively higher compensation over the years. Yet, the basis of determining the compensation is the value put on the land on the date it was acquired. Quite often, after the land is acquired, a project comes on the site. People seeking work in the project want build houses close to the project. Thus, demand for land near projects increases- and so also prices. The people who sold early regret their action and beat their breasts and say “If only I had waited…”. For such people, the Supreme Court of India has a redeeming idea. As reported in The Hindu (22-8-10) by its Legal Correspondent, the court says that the land’s potential future value must be considered for compensation.

 In a judgment which will benefit a large number of people whose land is acquired for public purposes, the Supreme Court has held that not only the present market value but also future potential value, and purpose for which the land is to be used must be taken into account for arriving at just compensation.

 A Bench of Justices Mukundakam Sharma and Anil R Dave said: “The market value of the acquired land cannot only be its value with reference to the actual use to which it was put on the relevant date envisaged under the Land Acquisition Act, but ought to be its value with reference to the better use to which it is reasonably capable of being put in the near future.” quoting an earlier judgment, the Bench said: “he court fixing the compensation should eschew… feats of imagination but occupy the armchair of a prudent, willing, but not too anxious, purchaser but always ask the question, ‘What are the prevailing conditions and whether a willing purchaser would, as a prudent man in the normal market conditions, offer to purchase the acquired land at the rates mentioned in the sale deeds.’”

 Writing the judgment Justice Sharma said that while awarding compensation to landowners, the court must be realistic, and “the potentiality of the acquired and, in so far as it relates to the use to which it is reasonably  capable of being put in the immediate or near future, must be given due consideration.”

 In the instant case, for providing Adi Dravidas with house sites, the Tamil Nadu government acquired 3.90 acres at Palangudi in Tiruchi district in September 1992. The Land Acquisition Officer awarded Rs.1.72 a square foot. At the instance of appellant A. Nateshan Pillai, the reference court fixed the market value of the land at Rs.17 a square foot. On the State’s appeal, the Madras High Court fixed the value at Rs.9. The present appeal by Pillai is directed against the judgment. Allowing the appeal the Bench said: “It cannot be disputed that the acquired land, being in the heart of the city and having excellent prospects of being used a residential site, definitely has an edge regarding potential value…The present acquired land has all the potentiality to be used as building sites, even in the immediate future, as it is located at a place in and around which building activity has already started. The acquired land is abutting the main road and is also surrounded by schools, panchayat union office, shops and residential buildings on all three sides.”

 The Bench held that the appellant would be entitled to compensation at the rate of Rs.11 a square foot, “which we consider just and fair. Needless to say, the State shall also be liable to pay additional compensation and solatium on the amount enhanced and fixed in terms of this order, including payment of interest in terms of the rate of interest awarded by the reference court.”

 The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.

And as athletes throughout the world wonder whether there are going to be Commonwealth Games this year, and have even started withdrawing from the event, let me hasten to assure them that all this tamasha, funfare and furore, concerning unfinished constructions and greased hands, is normal in India.

I mean, come on sports people do you go to Africa on a safari and expect five star comforts? No, you don’t, you just don’t know when yonder lion or tiger you watch from the safety of your jeep might just spring on your car, pull you out and eat you up, right? That’s the risk you take when you leave the comforts of home and hearth and venture into the jungle, so it is with mysterious India.

Imagine the surprise when you pull the flush chain in the Games village and the chain comes with you, a memento; a souvenir to take home, free!

Just think how surprised you’ll feel when the morning breakfast trumpet call is given and you run for breakfast, and run for breakfast because you don’t know where breakfast is being served, neither do the officials, the organizers and the President and you go back to Australia or England, looking lean and trim and people say when you go back, “Hey you on a diet?” And they walk away shaking their head in admiration and don’t hear you say, “I starved!”

And suppose you do win the bronze and climb the lower rung of the victory stand and there’s a loud crash because the chap who beat you, who’s face you want to smash for overtaking you on the track, has come crashing down from the top of the stand because the plywood gave way, and next day in all the papers you’re the only guy still standing. You won, dammit, you won, and you still don’t want to come to India?   

And then you stand and wait for your national anthem to be played and they play the national anthem of Pakistan instead of yours, just imagine the feeling, that beautiful warm feeling that another country is also sharing in your joy!

All this can only happen only in mysterious India!

So pack your bags dear athletes, and get on the plane, you’ll never regret what you’ll experience here, there’s never a dull moment; scores of flyovers have been built in a few weeks, breaking world records and you may find yourself jumping out of your bus and practicing long jump on one of them because your bus fell into a pothole! But remember every such occurrence has been meticulously planned, to give you an incredible exposure, in experiencing first hand, this land of mystery!

You don’t want to miss all this do you?

 Today’s Highlight

Power Sans Responsibility

Legislators in India manipulate power levers for their selfish ends as noted in “Should MLAs have power sans responsibility?”

Bob’s Banter

 Hail Sachin!

Bob, perhaps against the backdrop of downgrading Sachin Tendulkar, using a different scale of measure, sings his hosannas in “Simply Sachin..!”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

Should MLAs Have Power Sans Responsibility?

By John B. Monteiro

 “All power is a trust; that we are accountable for its exercise; that from the people and for the people all springs, and all must exist. – Benjamin Disraeli, English statesman and author (1805-1881).

 Members of Legislative Assemblies (MLAs) at the State level and Members of Parliament (MPs) at the Central level have the function of legislating, discuss and pass laws, and no any executive powers. Yet, specially MLAs  try to wield e3xecutive power by lobbying or pressurizing ministers who are heads of executive departments. One of the areas where MLAs interfere in the administration is by manipulating transfers of police, excise and RTO officials because these departments are considered cash cows, in terms of corruption, and pay handsomely in the form of one time auction of the post (transfer) or on a continuous stream of clandestine income during the tenure of the official. To counter this, the Supreme Court had suggested the constitution of Police Establishment Board with the power to handle transfers. Apparently this has hurt the interests of the MLAs who are now pressurizing the government to abolish the board, as reported by Rishikesh Bahadur Desai in The Hindu (19-8-10).

 According to Desai, it looks like the State Government is under pressure from the legislators to wind up the Police Establishment Board that decides postings and transfer of officials. Sources in the Government said that nearly 60 MLAs, cutting across party lines, had requested the Chief Minister B S Yeddyurappa and the Home Minister V S Acharya to scrap the board.

 The board set up recently as per Supreme Court directive in Prakash Singh vs. Union of India case, comprises senior police officials as per some policy guidelines. The system is replacing the “minute” system of transfers where MLAs recommend the transfer of officials and seek approval of the Chief Minister. “That is why the MLAs want the board scrapped. They feel it has reduced their power and influence,” a senior policy official said.

 The Home Minister said legislators had sought dilution of the board’s powers. According to him elected representatives were unhappy with the system, as some officers posted through the board were indifferent towards them. “This is a big problem now,” he said. “Posting officers is the inherent power of the elected government. We are answerable to the people. We are for separation of powers and decentralization; but we have to make sure senior officials don’ misuse their powers,” Dr Acharya reasoned.

 However senior officials disagree. “The Constitution says the legislature should make laws and the executive should run the government. But, by transferring officials, legislators are violating this principle of separation of powers,” a senior officer said. Secondly, the Board has not diluted the government’s powers. The Board only institutionalizes control and reduces the feudal system in policing now. It will strengthen the policing now. It will strengthen the principle of rule of law,” he said.

 The former Chief Minister, N Dharam Singh, MP, feels the Board should stay. “Administrative decisions like transfers should not politicized; that affects the quality of administration. The government should bow to political pressure. It should instead focus on strengthening the Board,” he said. “How can you expect a city Police Commissioner or Superintendent of Police to function properly if it lacks control over the subordinates? We should ensure that the police officers are given a free hand,” he said. “When I was the Chief Minister and Home Minister, most of my time was spent on obliging MLAs who wanted to transfer officials at will. We should put an end to political interference in administration,” Mr. Singh said.

 Former Director- General and Inspector-General of police, R Srikumar, feels the State government could invite charges of contempt of court if it were to interfere and negate wholesale the decisions of the Police Establishment Board without assigning tenable reasons

 We started with vintage British Prime Minister Disraeli. Another Prime Minister of similar vintage had said that that power without responsibility is the privilege of the harlot. Strangely, there are no defined duties and responsibilities for MPs and MLAs and no accountability can be fixed on non-performing lawmakers, the Lok Sabha Secretariat has informed a Right of Information activist Dev Ashish Bhattacharya. Similar replies have come from several state legislature secretariats. For instance, the Bihar Assembly reply said: “There is no provision in law through which accountability can be fixed on non-performing MLAs for their failure to perform their legal duties.

 The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.

One-day cricket, test matches and even the newer form of the game hardly interest me anymore, but there’s one time I put on the TV, and that’s when Sachin bats! He’s incredible, and the whole country stops what it’s doing when the little master walks to the crease. Today let’s hear what the rest of the world think of our national monument:

“Sachin, the man we all want to be” – Andrew Symonds wrote on an Aussie T-shirt he autographed specially for Sachin.
“Beneath the helmet, under that unruly curly hair, inside the cranium, there is something we don’t know, something beyond scientific measure. Something that allows him to soar, to roam a territory of sport that, forget us, even those who are gifted enough to play alongside him cannot even fathom. When he goes out to bat, people switch on their TV sets and switch off their lives.” – BBC on Sachin.
“Sachin is a genius. I’m a mere mortal.”- Brian Charles Lara
“We did not lose to a team called India…we lost to a man called Sachin.” – Mark Taylor, during the test match in Chennai (1997)
“The more I see of him the more confused I’m getting to which is his best knock.” – M. L. Jaisimha
“The joy he brings to millions of his countrymen, the grace with which he handles all the adulation and the expectations and his innate humility – all make for a one-in-a-billion individual,” – Glen McGrath
“I can be hundred per cent sure that Sachin will not play for a minute longer when he is not enjoying himself. He is still so eager to go out there and play. He will play as long as he feels he can play,” – Anjali Tendulkar
Shah Rukh Khan: “There was a big party where stars from bollywood and
cricket were invited. Suddenly, there was a big noise, then Sachin entered the hall and Amitabh was leading the queue to get a grab of the GENIUS!! – Shah Rukh Khan in an interview.”
“He can play that leg glance with a walking stick also.” – Waqar Younis
“I Will See God When I Die But Till Then I Will See Sachin’ – A banner in Sharjah
“His reflex time is the best I have ever seen. It’s like 1/20th of a sec. To get his wicket
better not prepare, at least you wont regret if he hits you for boundaries.” – Allan Donald
“On a train from Shimla to Delhi, there was a halt in one of the stations. The train stopped by for few minutes as usual. Sachin was nearing century, batting on 98. The passengers, railway officials, everyone on the train waited for Sachin to complete the century. This Genius can stop time in India!!” – Peter Rebouck – Aussie journalist
“Sachin cannot cheat. He is to cricket what (Mahatma) Gandhiji was to politics. It’s clear discrimination. ” – NKP Salve, former Union Minister when Sachin was accused of ball tempering
 “There are 2 kind of batsmen in the world. One Sachin Tendulkar. Two, all the others.” – Andy Flower
                   And finally, “I have seen god, he bats at no.4 for India” – Mathew Hayden

                   For those in India, he’s simply Sachin..!

 Today’s Highlight

Bonanza for MPs

There are less known perks which MPs enjoy as noted in “Should MPs Have Collateral Bonanza?”

Bob’s Banter

Indian Identity

Bob decries the rise of sub-national identities in “Where Are The Indians?”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

Should MPs Have Collateral Bonanza ?

By John B. Monteiro

 “Poverty wants much; but avarice, everything.” – Publicius Syrus, Syrian mimeographer  (Circa BC).

 On August 20, 2910, even after the proposed three-fold increase in the pay of MPs, from Rs. 16,000 to Rs, 50,000 per month, members, asking for Rs. 80,001, to beat the salary of Rs. 80,000 paid to Secretaries, got the Lok Sabha adjourned and conducted a mock parliament, designating themselves as Prime Minister, Speakers, etc. Very little is known about the perks, beyond the salary, that MPs get above the table under rules and under the table by pressurizing various agencies of the government. Beyond all this is the bonanza that they enjoy as, for instance, from state governments. The following report from Deccan Herald (20-8-10) is self-explanatory.

 In the wake of the debate over whether Members of Parliament should get a fatter pay or not, Chief Minister B S Yeddyurappa has announced additional benefits for Parliamentarians from Karnataka.

 Inaugurating the newly constructed Karnataka Bhavan annex building he (Delhi) on Thursday, the Chief Minister said the State government would provide 500 liters of petrol per month for each MP as against the existing 300 liters.

 Apart from this, the Chief Minister announced the construction of a new guest house in Bangalore to provide transit accommodation for state MPs. Many MPs are forced to stay in hotels when they visit the state capital as they do not have their own residence in Bangalore. The guest house will help them to overcome this problem, Yeddyurappa said.

The MPs, mostly from BJP, who were present at the function, welcomed the announcement with a big applause.

 Now, each MP is entitled to have a car, an office in the district headquarters, a driver and first and second division clerks at the cost of the State government’s exchequer. Besides, the State government also provides cars for them to travel in and around Delhi. This is apart from what the MPs are getting from the Central government as salary or perks and other facilities.

  Prior to the function, MPs met the Chief Minister and requested him to hike their fuel quota as well to resolve their accommodation problem in Bangalore.

The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.

 Today’s Highlight

Socialist Secularism

The preachings and doings vary dramatically among our netas as noted in “IS This Indian Socialist Secularism?”

Bob’s Banter

Indian Identity

Bob decries the rise of sub-national identities in “Where Are The Indians?”

For more insightful articles by Bob, hit his website – www.bobsbanter.com

CocktailPlaza 

Also have a look at our trivia/sublime, random quotes, Indiana and recycled humour in this section – as and when we schedule them afresh – or in the archives.

The CD on Laughter is loaded on this website for you to view/download.

The CD on laughter is loaded in the archives of this website for free downloading and use. Click on “laughter Plaza” on the top bar below the masthead on the home (front) page. Alert your friends who may be interested.

 Stay with us and help us to grow!

- John B. Monteiro

Is This Indian Socialist Secularism?

By John B. Monteiro

 “WE, THE PEOPLE OF INDIA, having solemnly resolved to constitute India into a SOVREIGN SOCIALIST SECULAR DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC and to secure for all its citizens….” (Emphasis added) – Preamble to the Indian Constitution.

 Set against this preamble is the following report published, in toto, in The New Indian Express (19-8-10) under the titled “Yeddyurappa gives in to Shobha again.”

 After convincing Chief Minister B S Yeddyurappa to announce a pension for transgenders on August 11, former minister and Yeshwantpur MLA Shobha Karandlaje once again showed her influence over Yeddyurappa on Wednesday (18-8-10). She not only convinced Yeddyurappa to visit the Ulsoor Someswara Temple, but also made him announce a plan to restore the glory of the temple that was visited by Sri Shankaracharya. The Chief Minister was generous enough to sanction Rs.10 crore on the spot to rejuvenate the temple besides removing all encroachments within a week.

 Shobha had initiated restoration of Someswara Temple’s Kalyani (pond) in April on the advice of astrologers from Kerala. It was believed that astrologers predicted a bright future for Shobha and Yeddyurappa if they restored the Kalyani that was buried under debris for years. It was also said that whenever Shobha or Yeddyurappa sought advice of astrologers through astamangala prashne, both of them were reminded of restoring the Kalyani here.

 On Wednesday, Shobha was seen briefing Yeddyurappa about the pond and measures to be taken to develop it. Later Yeddyurappa directed the Muzrai Department officials to clear encroachments on the temple land. The Chief Minister asked officials to take measures to develop the pond. “My government wants to restore the glory of Someswara Temple that was visited by Sri Shankaracharya. The government has taken up the restoration of Kalyani since I have been advised by the astrologers to restore the glory of Kalyani in the interest of the state’s well being. I want officials to develop it for the benefit of the devotees and in the interest of the state”, Yeddyurappa said.

 Stating that he would not tolerate failure of officials, he ordered clearing the land of encroachment in eight days. He said, “I will suspend officials who fail to discharge their duties.” The Chief Minister asked the officials to arrange meeting with the property owners to discuss compensation.

   That is for secularism. Now look at socialism invoked in the Constitution through a report in Deccan Herald (20-8-10):

 “Finding that his room at the opulent, Rs. 37-crore new Karnataka Bhavan in Chankyapuri diplomatic enclave here (Delhi) did not quite measure up to the chief minister’s, (Karnataka Governor) Bhardwaj has refused to approve of it. He wants as much a deluxe room as Yeddyurappa enjoys during his visits to the national capital.

 The chief minister’s bullet-proof, sound-proof and tamper-proof suite, with its flush sofas, bed, furniture and expensive fittings, is quite a sight to behold. Overzealous state government officials bent over backward to design a room on the fourth floor of Karnataka Bhavan which would please the chief minister who inaugurated it on Thursday (19-8). The suit is two-roomed – a bedroom and a living room … and an ante room that could double up as a dining hall. Besides, there are two kitchens, one to exclusively to prepare food for him and the other that will cook for his guests. This apart, Yeddyurappa’s suit has a swing, decorative artifacts and two home theatres.”

All this is too awe-inspiring to spoil the scene by bringing in the oft-promised rehabilitation, including housing, of thousands of people who lost everything in last year’s devastating floods in north Karnataka.

 The subject is open to many views. What are yours? Over to you.